Friday, October 16, 2009

Making Yourself a Priority

Last night in my Weight Watchers meeting we talked about taking care of yourself and putting yourself first. As women, we're very good at taking care of others, but we tend to let ourselves fall by the wayside. Wives and mothers have an especially hard time putting themselves first because most of the time not only do they have a household to run, but they also have a demanding job outside the home. By virtue of birth most women are nurturers. Nurturing others comes easy, but when it comes to nurturing oneself, it might take a bit more work.

Some of the things that might keep us from doing so are lack of time, the feeling that maybe we don't deserve it, or feelings of guilt for actually spending time on ourselves. The example we saw our mothers set can also be a factor. My own mother is a very selfless woman. She sacrificed a lot to provide a loving home for my father, me, and my two brothers. There are many things she wanted or wanted to do, but felt that she needed to put us first. Looking back on it now, I wish that she had put herself first more. I think she missed out on a lot because of us.

That realization is a big motivator for me to nurture myself a little bit. Deciding to lose weight is one of the ways that I'm taking care of myself. Not only does it help me physically, it also helps me mentally and emotionally. There are a lot of us out there who are emotional eaters. Whenever someone or something hurts us or makes us sad, we grab a bag of chips or a pack of cookies. In the moment that food tastes pretty damn good, but afterward you're pissed at yourself because you ate a whole package of cookies that will be taking up residence on your thighs momentarily. Once that thought strikes you, you get depressed. If you're depressed you might wanna reach for that pint of Ben and Jerry's. Now you just ate a package of cookies and hated yourself for it. Why are you reaching for the Ben and Jerry's? Because maybe it'll make you feel less depressed. It all becomes a vicious cycle, one that I've been caught up in many times. One day I reached my breaking point and had to put up a big STOP sign.

Now that I've done that, I'm able to look at my life and the world around me from a better perspective. We all want and need to be loved by others, but we also need love from ourselves. Breaking out a little bit of Whitney Houston "Learning to love yourself, it is the greatest love of all". If you love and nurture yourself, you'll feel so much better about yourself, which will in turn enrich your relationships with other people. I find that when I take good care of myself I have better interactions with those around me. Funny how that works, huh?


  1. Oh the vicious circle of eating & hating yourself. I know it well. It's a hard behaviour to address but well worth the perseverance to beat it.
    It's true that you behave by the example your Mum sets I catch myself being the house slave all the time.
    I will stop it long enough to have a facial :)

  2. Wonderful blog. So true. It's one of the biggest problems we all share is learning to take care of ourselves. Now, I'm not a woman nor a mom, but I know that this applies universally. I'm going to show this to Her Highness. She lets her "to do" list become out of control too often and doesn't always do what you said, "Stop."

    Thanks for such a great blog.