My First Year of High School

As you may remember, because of restructing of the schools (as well as renovations), I was in high school for five years, starting in eighth grade. My first year of high school was actually my older brother's last year. Although he's only three years older than me, he was four grades ahead of me because I started school late. I got to know some of his friends, and they didn't treat me like some little kid just tagging along. By that time I was 14. As a matter of fact, none of the older kids treated us any differently, which was nice.

In elementary school, I encountered the occasional spate of racism from students, but high school was different. White students didn't have a problem with me. Other black students did. Because my friends had always been white, that's who I hung out with for the most part. A few of my cousins were in the same grade that I was in so sometimes I hung out with them, but whenever all of us were with other black students, they made fun of me. They picked on me for the way that I talked (they said I talked white, i.e. intelligently) and they called me an Oreo (black on the outside and white on the inside). I remember crying about this and going to the school counselor. I couldn't understand why they would do such a thing. I was just minding my own business, not bothering anyone. I chose not to hang out with them because they used the excuse of being black for very ignorant behavior. My mama raised me better than that. Luckily, as my eighth grade year progressed, the bullying stopped, but to this day it still hurts.

It's Okay to Be Who You Are

Over the past few decades, individuality has become taboo. A lot of young women feel that if they don't look and act like everyone else, they'll be left out in the cold. And then there are those that profess to be individuals, but are only the latest in a long line of conformists. At various stages of our lives we all want to fit in, but should never try so hard that we lose sight of who we are. I've always been someone who does my own thing. At times my choices have overlapped with what is or was the latest thing, but I never consciously sought to model myself after those things. Unfortunately, the quest for individuality can result in bullying. Years ago when we thought of bullying, we thought of larger boys beating up on smaller boys and sometimes girls. Now girls are bullies. There's the whole mean girl phenomenon that took hold about 10 years or so ago. Most of bullying from girls isn't physical, it's verbal. Rumors are spread and uncool girls are frozen out of the group. What I've described happens in elementary school. It only gets worse in middle and high school. It's becoming tougher and tougher for females as they grow up. The best thing for parents to do would be to let them know that it's okay to be different. Different doesn't equal bad. If we were all exactly the same and liked the same things, we'd be bored to death. Our differences are what make us interesting.