When Your World Stops Turning

Last night I found out some very sad news. Someone that I grew up with in Georgia, that I had known since I was 5-years old passed away. I'll be 34 in 22 days. This is not supposed to be happening. There are so many people in this world that are positively evil and they get to live nice, long lives. Granted, some of them are in prison, but still they've lived to see another day. My friend, who was genuinely a good person will never wake up in her own bed again, wondering what the day has to offer. She'll never get to eat her favorite foods and watch her favorite TV shows. I know that there's supposed to be another existence far superior to the one that we lead here on Earth, but damnit, she had a lot more living to do! She was the only person that I've been in contact with during recent years that saw me in all of the stages of my early development. Elementary, middle, and high school we knew each other. We hung out. We talked. We did things together. Up until about 5 years ago, I hadn't seen her since we graduated from high school, but then a mutual friend brought us together again. I knew she was sick, but I had no idea how bad it had gotten. She's the 5th person from my high school graduating class that has passed away (at least as far as I know), and I've only been out of high school for 15 years. Something like this makes me face my own mortality, but it also makes me wonder who chooses which people live to see another day and which end up dying young. What is it based on? I know some people who should've been dead long ago, but they're still here causing misery and heartache. It seems that many who could do a lot of good in this world leave it too soon. This is something that I know I'll never understand, but it won't stop me from wondering. Those of you who are religious will say that this is the way that things were meant to be. Although I'm not particularly religious, I am spiritual, and I know that things have their own reasons for happening. That still doesn't change the fact that I'm sad that Amy is gone. She went through some tough times and I'm glad she doesn't have to deal with them anymore, but I can't help questioning it all as my world stops turning for a brief moment in contemplation of what was and what will never be. Rest in Peace, Amy. I thoroughly enjoyed our time together.